Cancer Sucks (and other things Kate taught me)

Our family lost our sweet Aunt Kate* last month to a long battle with cancer. It was Tanti Kate that told me to “find the intersection of my greatest passion and the world’s greatest need”, a phrase that led me, ultimately, to the World Race. 

Today, I write for Kate. 

My mom, me, and Aunt Kate.

Dear Kate,

I hope you’re looking down from Heaven, laughing as I try to proof-read every blog post so they’re up to your standards and smiling as we say *cheers* to Aperol Spritz on the back patio (because let’s be honest, it’s always happy hour here). I hope your heart warms to see me still sending handmade love letters; but don’t get mad that I’ve only sent one of the cards you made for me; they’re just too dang special to give away. And, I hope I make you proud as I pack my bags to serve the far-flung corners of the world. 

I could go on forever about how much you taught me, the ways you shaped my worldview, and how we laughed together, but I’m going to stick with one sweet memory.

When I was in college, I wrote my senior thesis on how to integrate intention, vulnerability and community in a career, regardless of industry. At the time, I was also applying for the Peace Corps, so I interviewed you for “empirical and anecdotal research” (aka, a Skype date)… mostly so I could pick your brain about your time with the Peace Corps in Côte d’Ivoire.

You left your corporate job to serve where you were needed most. You left your role as a human-doing (all the things, all the lists, all the time) to focus on human-being (listening to, identifying, and meeting the needs of others). Sure, you had degrees and certificates, but you chose to focus on how you could serve others. You laid down your own agenda for the needs of your Taabo village, and this required such humility that it brought you to your knees (pre-hip surgery, of course). The library and the sewage system are the fruit of your work, and your sacrifice is beyond me (once more for the people in the back: SEWAGE system. Nobody makes a sewage system without a hell of a lot of humility). The Taabo village will forever be grateful for your service.

In your interview, you put language to what I already had gathered about your character: to you, people matter most. To the Taabo you weren’t just the “white lady”, Tanti Kate, you were THEIR white lady; you were THEIR American, and they weren’t going to let anyone mess with you. When Côte d’Ivoire broke into civil war 18 months into your service, the Peace Corps evacuated you. Your village people stood up for you, brought you food when you weren’t allowed to leave your home, rallied around you, and were devastated when you were forced to leave. Your village leader even called the capital after you left to ask if you were adjusting okay and whether there was anything the village could do for you. I wasn’t surprised in the slightest, because their care for you is a testament to the way you foster community. You go to battle for your people; you defend the defenseless; you are love, personified.

You told me the Peace Corps was the place where your passion intersected with the world’s greatest need. It was the “toughest job [you] ever loved”. Our Skype date probably should have been a viral podcast that got us on The Ellen Show; I was so lucky that you chose to share your story with me. You poured out such love, wisdom and all things good in the world, and helped me earn an A on my senior thesis—praise be, baby! Your challenge to me–to find the place where my passion intersected with the world’s greatest need–ultimately led me to the World Race. You were always a big supporter of me serving abroad (even with the 153 questions, numbered, in order of importance, you asked to make sure it was ethically sound).

I’m going to miss having you at family vacations, and sending you life-size paper hugs and gluten-free cookies, but I will keep your legacy of love alive. I will miss visiting you in Chicago, your eye for redecorating and your willingness to clean our house (I still can’t believe you enjoyed that), but I will keep your legacy of love alive. You lived with everything in you and overflowed with love to everyone you met, so I will, too. Life may end, but love never will. I will take your legacy to the ends of the earth with the World Race. 

I miss you. I love you. Thank you; I carry you with me. 

Kati

JOIN ME IN PRAYER: Lord, we lift up Kate and her family. Cover us in Your peace that surpasses all understanding. We know You grieve with us in our loss; turn our mourning into dancing. 

*I call Kate my aunt, but really she was my parents’ best friend since ’93 (before I was born). She’s my favorite family member.